Breaking Through Your Resistance
Do you feel shy about putting yourself on video? Or self-conscious about presenting online? Does that keep you from the big opportunities that you want? Our comfort zone can be a cage that keeps us small and fearful. Breaking through resistance requires focused effort, but is extremely empowering.
I’m very private and always shut my camera for webinars. I’m self-conscious when I’m not groomed. I have resistance against strangers looking into my private home space. For longer webinars, I don’t have my game face on and don’t want people to see that.
Yesterday, I joined a webinar where everyone had their cameras turned on. Although I wasn’t made-up, I grudgingly complied. Then, to my horror we’re asked to stand up and dance with the camera turned on.
Some people are ok doing this. Not me.
Resistance Is Our Limitation
I’m not shy of the camera, and I love dancing. However, doing both makes me feel “exposed” and looking stupid. I dread that.
But I broke through my resistance and…danced.
At first, it was awkward. So I just kept dancing, and let the music move me. Then 30 seconds in, I enjoyed it! I even threw in silly dance moves and felt carefree and childlike.
Cracking that wall of self-consciousness released the self-judgement that I must always look composed. This feeling of lightness and freedom stayed with me for the rest of the day. Today, I had no qualms about dancing with abandon on camera.
We all have very strong reasons for our resistance that limits our growth.
Breaking Through With The First Step
Changing our behaviours is difficult. These were formed through years of conditioning, and maintained because of our beliefs. They served us before, but may not be useful now. By consciously engaging our mental, physical and emotional energies consistently, that helps us to summon the fortitude to make those changes.
This requires will and effort and has to be practiced over time. Start with small things like trying a new flavor that you were resistant to.
It’s through uncomfortable situations and challenges that we’re able to grow so I’ve been priming myself mentally to embrace discomfort in my growth journey. I set the intention for this. This would help me change unwanted habits, and I’ve deliberately taken on a variety of uncomfortable situations to stretch my mental boundaries.
This would help me change unwanted habits, and I’ve deliberately taken on a variety of uncomfortable situations to stretch my mental boundaries.
I’ve also been managing my emotional baseline to be calm and optimistic. I stayed away from people who were driven by conflict or insecurities and focused on simple things that feel emotionally good, like playing with pets, gardening and helping others. I spent more time on breath mediations to harness my core of stability.
Finally when I committed myself to the action, I threw my shoulders back, took a deep breath and used the exhale energy to propel myself into dancing with the camera on. It’s the same way the exhale breath helps us to go deeper into a yoga stretch.
Empowering Our Growth
This seemingly small step is a big win for me. It’s not about leaving my camera on during a webinar. It’s about letting my guard down to be silly, have fun and allow creativity and joy in.
After reflecting on this, I realise that I’ve been so focused on projecting authority and credibility for so many years that I’ve forgotten to be spontaneously playful and childlike. Being playful has mental and physical benefits.
Regaining that helped pushed my comfort zone boundaries out a little bit more. It also gave me space to not be so hard on myself.
Our strong reasons for the resistance may not serve us anymore, so it’s truly empowering to overcome them. That gives us momentum towards more growth.
Do you have any resistance that you’re trying to break through?